Methods of raising children

Methods of education of children, applied by parents of different countries and nationalities, are largely due to the cultural traditions of their people. You can find a lot of differences in the traditional European and oriental system of education.

For example, you can often hear that Japaneseparents up to five years of age allow their children almost everything and indulge their whims. But few know that the next period in the education of Japanese children is associated with a huge number of restrictions and conventions, unquestioning obedience to the elders, especially parents.

The traditional value system of the Japanese differs from the European, and this method of education was developed in Japan for centuries. That is why it is effective for Japanese children.

In general, however, methods of raising children very much. There are both recognized methods, scientifically founded by educators, and unrecognized, "home", which are most often used in everyday life.

Some methods of education are effective only fora certain age of the child, while others are relevant throughout life. In addition, there are methods of "emergency", designed to solve problem situations. So, what are the main methods of raising children?

Method of conversation or belief. This method is suitable for any age (asonly the child begins to understand speech) and any character. The essence of it is that the parent in a calm confident tone explains to the child how to behave. Apply this method best in combination with other methods.

Method of positive reinforcement. This method of education implies certainactions of parents in response to the child's actions. Positive reinforcement is an incentive, for example, praise, gratitude, encouragement in the form of a treat or a toy. The essence of the method is to consolidate the child's sequence of actions - a good act leads to encouragement.

The method of negative reinforcement. This method is analogous to the method of positivereinforcements, but differs in that certain negative actions of parents follow in response to negative actions of the child. Parents express their negative attitude towards the child's act (but not to himself!) With reproach, remarks, punishment.

A variety of punishments can be time-out and penalties. The timeout method is still the same, wellfamiliar to many since childhood method of "angle." The guilty child is put in a corner to ponder his action. In the modern interpretation of this method, parents can leave the child not in the corner, but simply one in the room or temporarily stop paying attention to the child's requests.

Penalties should be applied according to the age of the child. A common penalty is depriving the child of pleasure, for example, watching a cartoon or walking.

It should not be allowed that, as a fine, a childperformed those actions that should bring pleasure. For example, it is not possible for a child to clean his toys in punishment, otherwise the cleaning of toys will forever remain an unpleasant process for him and the child will avoid it in every possible way.

Punishment can be effective, that is, one that gives the desired result. This method of education is called method of effective punishment. This method is applicable in cases where there are few bans, but they are, as they say, "iron". Such prohibitions are not allowed to violate either adults or children.

In addition, effective punishment can only bein cases where prohibitions, as well as penalties for their violation, are understandable and coordinated. At the same time, the ratio of punishments to incentives should not be more than 1: 7.

So-called method of "carrot and stick" - one of the most common methodsupbringing, applied at home. The method is based on a combination of methods of positive and negative reinforcement, depending on the child's behavior.

Method of warning or method "1-2-3". This method of upbringing works by the principle ofdelay of punishment with the possibility of avoiding it. The parent warns the child that if he does not stop behaving badly, then three will follow the penalty.

Clearly and slowly, in a calm tone (without threateningnotes) the parent counts to three. The child has time to think and change his behavior. If the child does not change the behavior, then the parent must necessarily bring the penalty in execution.

The method is applicable for children older than two years.

Method of the worn out plate. This method helps parents not to waste time on persuasion, but to get the child to obedience. The essence of the method is a monotonous repetition of its requirements until the child does not fulfill it.

For example, instead of lengthy explanations whythe child must dress and go to the kindergarten, you need to calmly repeat the demand: "Get dressed and go to the kindergarten." The child sees that it is useless to argue, so sooner or later come to the conclusion that you will still have to dress.