Participation of grandparents in raising a child
People of the older generation who are proudthe title of grandparents, always try to actively participate in the educational process of an adored grandson or granddaughter. It is the grandmothers and grandfathers who pleasurefully indulge children, indulge their whims, or, on the contrary, believe that the child should be kept in "snap gloves". Should grandparents participate in the upbringing of the child? How to find a compromise?
Different parents differently build communication of their children with their grandparents. Some, especially if the family lives withthe older generation in one house, the children are left to the care of their grandmother permanently. Others bring grandchildren to their grandmothers on weekends or on holidays. And some parents arrange visits to grandmothers and grandchildren only on major holidays. But in any case, the grandmother considers her right and duty to somehow help a young family in raising a child.
There are several, so to speak, species of grandmothers. "Ordinary" grandmothers mainly take care of the child to eat on time, take a walk, and buy. They are not inclined to interfere in the educational process. Such grandmothers can pamper your grandson with sweets, toys.
Grandmothers "Active" almost completely immersed in educationthe kid. They walk with the child, help him to do homework, attend exhibitions or theaters with the child. Such grandmothers feel very well when the grandson needs support and render it.
"Suspended" and clean "Symbolic" grandmothers are practically not involved in the upbringing of the child. These grandmothers meet their grandchildren several times a year.
Whichever of these categories your grandmother is a child of, it is always better to agree with her in advance on the methods of educating your baby in order to avoid conflict situations.
For example, agree, how and how to feed the child, when to allow himto walk, what TV shows to watch the child. If you feel that the grandmother or grandfather, despite all your contracts, is going to do it in your own way, you need to reasonably explain your position and listen carefully to the version of the grandparents. Perhaps their life experience and wisdom will in some cases prove to be very useful.
By the way, if in some questions you and grandparents do not agree, then To explain it it is necessary and to the child. For example, if you allow the child to walk barefoot at home and the grandmother forbids, then tell the child that the grandmother at home has a colder floor and therefore she is very upset, no matter how her grandson gets sick.
In no case Do not argue with grandparents in the child. AND Do not complain about them at the baby. All this will interfere with the normal development of the relationship of grandparents and the child.
It happens that grandparents from "differentparties "are not quite friendly with each other. In this case, some grandmothers and grandfathers like to "pull" the child "to their side." They may respond poorly to their second grandparents. To avoid this, make it clear to both sides that your child is not a means to "disassemble" them. Strictly forbid such statements at the baby.
Many grandparents are so eager to pamper a child just because they are afraid of losing his love. They give the child candies and chocolates,If only the kid was always happy to meet. You can find a compromise. For example, let the grandmother treat the grandson with apple or home-made juice instead of regular chocolates. Let instead of the cartoon will bring as a gift some development game.
The older generation are the keepers of traditions. And although not always grandparents understand thatmuch has changed since their youth, they can sometimes give very valuable advice. Therefore, no matter what, grandparents in the upbringing of the child should take part. But the degree of this participation you will have to determine personally for yourself.
