If the child does not let go of his mother

First, let's figure it out, but why, in fact, the child does not want to let go of my mother? The child is simply afraid that his mother will leave and no longerwill return, especially if threats are used as an educational tool: "You will behave badly - I will go away!". It is still difficult for a small child to understand that her mother has some affairs of her own. He starts to think that his mother is leaving because of him, because of his bad behavior. As a result - whims, tears, hysterics. It is especially difficult for at least a short time to release mother to those children who spend most of their time with their mother and never, or almost never, remain with someone else.

So, where to start? First, if you are going somewhere to leave, even for half an hour, never do it secretly! Just imagine the reaction of the baby, who suddenly discovers that the mother has disappeared. He will search for you around the house and inconsolably cry. And when you come, will not let go of a single step.

Secondly, never blame the child in that it prevents you from leaving. Do not frighten him. the fact that you will not return. Do not shame the child, for the fact that he is already big, but he cries. Do not threaten deprivation of toys. All these reproaches only aggravate the anxiety of the baby and he begins to be capricious even more.

Even the smallest child always explain, where and for how long you are leaving. Speak with phrases accessible to the child, for example, "I'll go to the store, and come back when you eat." Such soothing phrases will help the child to wait for your return.

Your child is very subtle about your anxiety and anxiety. If he sees that his mother is worried, this is also a cause for concern for him. Therefore, when leaving, keep calm, confident, smile.

To keep you child uses proven means - cry and tears. Do not give in to to this "provocation". Once you just go on about tearing and stay, and your child will use this method always. But also to leave, having thrown the child crying, it is wrong. It is better to collect a few minutes beforehand in order to explain to the baby that you will stay for a while, but still go on business. Thus, the child will learn that not everything always happens only by his will and desire. This is a useful lesson for the future.

Do not promise the child "golden mountains" For the fact that he will let you go. First, by this you dilute it, and secondly, if you can not fulfill the promise, the next time the child will simply not believe you. But do not refuse the baby if he himself asks to bring him a gift. However, if the request does not work out, be sure to warn the child about it.

So that each of your care does not become the central event of the day, do not tighten farewell. The longer you say goodbye, the more you and the child suffer.

To accustom the child to your absence, it is useful to leave it for a while with someone else: father, grandmother, sister, nanny. The more a child communicates with other adults, the easier it will be to let you go. A useful game for developing a sense of self-reliance in a child is the usual "hide and seek". You hide, the child at first is afraid, and then finds you and rejoices. So he learns to understand that while you were gone, nothing terrible happened.

Sometimes, even when the child is already used to the temporary absence of the mother, he suddenly again begins to be capricious at your leaving. Do not rush to worry. This return to "childhood" can mean that your baby, on the contrary, is on the threshold of a new stage of development. Just at some point of its rapid development and constant exploration of the world, the kid begins to feel the need to return to the warm and safe mother's arms. In them, the child draws confidence and new strength.

Bringing up a child, be patient and always try to show your love and care to the crumb. Then the child will be able to let you go without any fear.

Good luck and patience!