Why do children lie?
Childish lies - another headache for parents. Children can lie, hiding their misdeed and fearing punishment, and they can lie and just as they say for the soul. What causes children to lie?
Sometimes children with violent imagination lie unconsciously. They simply sincerely believe in their fantasies and consider them quite real. This can not even be considered a true lie and it is not necessary to punish a child for such actions.
Some children lie especially to cheer others around. Such deception is harmless, because it is not used for mercenary purposes. Adults can even play along with such a liar.
But most often The answer to the question "Why do our children lie?". Children are not born false, they take the lie,copying the behavior of adults. After all, we, adults, are often vaccinated "for the good", for example, to force a child to remove toys or to eat lunch. Gradually, children realize that untruth helps them achieve their goals. For example, if you say that you are offended in the kindergarten, then parents will necessarily regret, and maybe even give a candy.
Children, like adults, lie to:
- avoid the unpleasant consequences of their actions
- to show oneself in a more favorable light
- Increase your visibility and popularity
- to show one's independence
If the process of lying is not stopped in time, the child may lie in such a way that it is completely confused. Therefore, if you find that your child is deceiving you should take action.
When a lie is uncovered, Do not immediately attack the child with accusations and threats. Allow yourself to cool down, calm down and only then start "debriefing." It is important for you to understand the cause of the deception. Perhaps you are too cruel or unfair to the child?
Always set a good example your child. If you are honest with the child in everything, even in small things, then the best means of influence simply can not be found. If, for example, you gave a promise to a child, but because of the circumstances you can not fulfill it, be sure to apologize to the child and honestly explain why they did not keep their promises.
If the child lies to avoid unpleasant fixes, then on a personal example, show, how to overcome such situations without lying. For example, with a smile, treat some of the failures and incidents, explain to the child the motives of the actions of others and your own.
A child who is secretive in nature can begin to lie, so that he can not keep up with his parents. Recognize the right of the child for some of your own personal secrets, because you have such a right.
If the child is excessively fantasizing, then in the future he can grow up just a loafer. It is impossible that fantasy substitutes the real world for the child. therefore instill a taste for the child in the present case.
Lies are undoubtedly a vice. But in some cases, the so-called, "Polite" lie is necessary. For example, when on a visit your child will publicly say "And my mother cooks better!" Or "And that aunt is fat!", You will agree, you will feel extremely awkward. The ability to speak tactfully without offending others is a whole art, which is very difficult to teach a baby. Therefore, it is important for you to explain to the child that this is not even a complete deception, but simply politeness. Let your child learn to thank friends and relatives, even for those gifts that disappoint him.
Never let a child lie on its own. If you can not figure out the causes of childish lies, ask for help from a child psychologist.
And how do you cope with childish lies? Do you punish your child for cheating?
