How to save a marriage

Marriages must be for love. Of course, you can not argue with this. But sometimes even the strongest feelings go out and therefore love alone may not be enough to create a "reinforced" marriage. If the husband and wife in marriage forget that they once linked them, then in their relationship there is a crisis: if this crisis is not resolved, the marriage is threatened with disintegration.

Marriage is not only romance, gifts andinfinite happiness from the fact that a loved one is nearby and will not go anywhere. This is also a routine household duties, which, however you may say, can not be avoided. To save the marriage, you need to learn to break the routine and not "zaedatsya" on household trivialities.

At all, absolutely avoid problems in marriage will not succeed, because the union is joined by people with establishedcharacters, habits that do not always coincide. That is why quarrels and disputes between spouses are a common thing, one should not be afraid of such quarrels. True, quarrels should be "correct", for example, here are some common mistakes that the spouses make during quarrels.

The first error - quarrels with outsiders. A married couple should not quarrel in sightothers - internal relations must remain internal. The assumption that the public presentation of the claims to the partner will help him to realize his wrong and correct, is mistaken: no one will cause good emotions in a situation in which he is insulted and accused in every way.

The second error - hasty conclusions and generalizations. In the heat of quarrel, the very subject of the dispute is often successfulforgotten and the couple begin to throw each other's accusations of ruined youth, missed chances, etc. To save a marriage with constant attempts to "nag" a partner is very difficult.

Another mistake - discussion of relatives during disputes. To save a marriage, do not need during quarrelsgo to the discussion of relatives, because it is fraught with a long serious scandal. Phrases such as "You are just like your mother!" Are forced during a quarrel to switch from the issue under discussion to defending the honor and dignity of family members. You can "argue" to such epithets, after which there will be no way back.

Preservation of marriage is a matter for both spouses. Success is not achieved if only one partner is making efforts to strengthen relations. For example, not only the husband can make his wife gifts and compliments, it is desirable that it was the other way around, because men, by the way, are very fond of when they are praised and pampered with signs of attention.

If the relationship in marriage has developed so that the coupleseriously began to think about divorce, then even in this case it's not too late to worry about how to save the marriage. Perhaps, both partners need a little respite to realize their feelings and desires. Only such a respite should not turn into a flirtation haphazard or "hang" in nightclubs: it's best to be alone with your thoughts somewhere in the bosom of nature.

If you have any problems in your marriage, you should neverbe afraid to go to a therapist or, if spouses are believers, to a spiritual mentor. Sometimes a fresh look from the side to the problems of the spouses helps them to re-evaluate their relationship in a new way, to recall the good that binds them.

Struggle for preservation of marriage - this is good, but if it is clear that to save the marriage is notit turns out, it also needs to be able to accept, because there are cases when such a struggle is appropriate, but there are situations where divorce is the best solution. For example, if a husband constantly beats his wife, if in a family he behaves like a tyrant and a despot, then there is no point in maintaining such a marriage. The best way out of the situation will be the severance of relations, because in a married couple should always love and respect each other.