Ability to communicate

According to scientists, communication processes in one form or another take about 70% of our time. The ability to communicate is necessary for us both in personal,and in professional life. It helps to establish good relations with people, achieve certain professional goals, and finally build a personal life. However, what exactly is meant by the ability to communicate? What skills do you need to develop in order to learn how to communicate well?

The ability to communicate includes the skills of both verbal (verbal) and non-verbal communication. To be considered a pleasant companion, you neednot only know what to say, but also be able to say it correctly. This requires a rich vocabulary, the ability to "adjust" to the intellectual level of the interlocutor and select the right words, expressions and wording, depending on the situation of communication. When communicating, it is important to be able to formulate your thoughts briefly and clearly.

Also You need to work on your non-verbal communication: gestures, facial expressions, intonations. Often gestures, facial expressions and intonations speak to the interlocutor more than words. If you use them correctly, you can achieve your goals in communication much more quickly. And vice versa - if you do not follow your nonverbal communication, you can inadvertently inform the interlocutor more than you planned.

The ability to communicate also includeserudition and horizons, knowledge of the rules of etiquette, the ability to control one's own emotional state, respect for the interlocutor, goodwill, active listening skills and much more. Also it is very important that the style of communication corresponds to the situation: it is understood that you will communicate with colleagues or clients differently than with friends or family members. Above all these skills you can and should work.

If you yourself do not get to become more relaxed in communication, perhaps it makes sense to attend a special training. but the choice of training should be approached very responsibly. His program should be aimed at,to help you liberate yourself. And if, according to the trainer, effective communication consists in using NLP techniques and manipulating interlocutors, participation in such training is unlikely to help you.

But the simplest and at the same time effective way to develop your ability to communicate - not to avoid communication. Even if you do not decide yetinitiate a conversation, even if you do not need to "go into a defense", if someone spoke to you first. The problem for many people is that they are pre-arranged for the worst. Try to change this attitude; try to consider that the interlocutor is initially attuned to you benevolently, until the opposite becomes obvious.

There is an opinion that the ability to communicate inherentonly extroverts, but it is not. Perhaps extroverts communicate more easily than introverts, and they get more pleasure from it, but this does not mean that all introverts are closed and unsociable and do not get the pleasure of communicating. Also, most people are not "pure" introverts or extroverts, they are rather ambivers (somewhere in the middle). Therefore, often, introversion justifies the reluctance to work on themselves and improve interpersonal skills.

For some people the ability to communicate is a kind ofinnate talent, some communication is given with difficulty, but no one can live without communication. The main thing - do not get hung up on what you do not get, and focus on the positive aspects of communication. Then, in time, you realize that it brings you more and more pleasure and less discomfort.